I have a confession to make.
Life off the pill is WONDERFUL.
I've stopped taking it before, and the change was never this drastic. But for some reason, this time, it's been night and day.
When your husband turns to you in Wal-Mart of all places and says, "Have you noticed that we actually get along now that you're off the pill?", it's a big deal.
I don't feel the need to get pissed off at him every four seconds. The rage feeling in my chest is gone. I actually went outside for a walk with the girls today, and just enjoyed the moment. I made cookies yesterday (oatmeal coconut raisin, and oatmeal chocolate chip, in case you wondered) and I'm making bread to go with ham and potatoes tonight. I'm becoming positively Marthaish.
I'm also positively happy, and it's really really ODD.
I'm sure this is just in conjunction with an up cycle. I've come to grips with the fact that I am most likely bi-polar, and I'll need to live with this for the rest of my life. To some degree, I've come to accept that in some ways, I'm at the mercy of my brain chemistry. But BOY, the difference not taking those goddammed pills. It's like opening the window in a public bathroom. The difference between gagging until you puke, and sweet fresh air.
I will also say that I'm enjoying having an actual libido for once in my life. Although the Dorf is getting a wee bit tired. It's also opening a can of worms sexually for me, in terms of my preferences, but I don't really want to get into that here. I'm having enough trouble coming to terms with it myself. So some other post.
So my confession today is, it's a beautiful day, and I'm quite content, Despite stepping on a rusty nail while exploring the woods behind the house with the girls (Tetnus shots last ten years, right?)
So nothing depressing, or thought provoking or stupid or whiny today. Just...hold your loveys a little closer today. Enjoy the very moments you could sit in forever.
Tetanus shots last ten years. And hurt like a bitch.
I am so glad you are in a brighter place, Dor. Although I've not been commenting, Ive been here as you let the pain out (and I think it's contributing to your up cycle). It's nice to see you get a little bit of joy back.
Posted by
Anonymous |
2:23 p.m.
What she said. Echo, echo.
Posted by
Anonymous |
3:28 p.m.
WOW.
It's amazing how differently we all react to the pill. I've gone off of it before but the only difference I saw was a massive increase in pimples.
I'm just glad you're feeling better! :)
Posted by
Anonymous |
1:10 a.m.
The pill is fucking evil.
Sooo....can I ask what you are using for BC then? I want a more permanent solution, but the big V apparently can GROW BACK.....I have a friend with twins who found out the hard way about that one.
If I end up with a c-section, I'll have things tied, burned, clamped or whatever, otherwise we need other methods.
Posted by
Anonymous |
2:54 p.m.
Sisypus My foot hurts like hell, so if it gets weird, I figure I have to go in. I thought 10 years was the number, so I should be good. Had the last one in 97. Glad you're lurking. :)
Nicole I've never had this kind of change before-Rosalyn did something rather LARGE to my body when I was pregnant and had her. I'm not sure what it was, but I'm LIKING this. I don't know if being molested as a child tied into never ever having a real libido, but I'm really enjoying having one like everyone else.
Jen heh...we currently are using "alternate forms of play" since I'm waiting for ye old tube tie. We're not being stupid (and the two times I got pregnant, we WERE stupid) and we know exactly what position gets us pregnant, so we aren't running any risks, if you know what I mean. The tubal isn't invasive at all, so you could get it at any time from what I'm told. Usually, there's no real rest needed either. We'll see.
Posted by
thordora |
2:59 p.m.
Mmmmm..... Now I want to make oatmeal coconut chocolate chip cookies.
Posted by
Anonymous |
5:04 p.m.