Spin Me I Pulsate.: Dear Dave Navarro

Hi Dave

I am well aware that you are a "rocker" and that you run the show and all. And I realize that it's highly likely that Carmen took you to the cleaners with the divorce, and has left you a little high and dry and all. Which is why I'm offering to buy you some shirts.

I mean really. You were in Jane's Addiction for freaks sake. You can afford to buy a shirt, or at the very least, put buttons on the ones you have. Do you think the world WANTS to see your craptastic tattoos? Or your hairless mole rat chest? You look like a weasel, and most weasels at least have the decency to wear some fur to cover their ratlike nipples.

You're executive producer of Rockstar: Supernova, we know. YOU DA MAN. But dude, just cover that shit up. It gives me indigestion to watch. Actually, it's a tie between your shiny white chest and Brooke Burke and her baby making boobies saying "Rockers". Both make me equally nauseaous. And it's terrible-do an internet search, and all I can see if your PASTY chest. Are you obsessed with your nipples? Why? They don't DO anything.

So come on, I'm sure we can get some funds together to cover those puppies. At least my stomach hopes so.

Posted by thordora on Wednesday, August 30, 2006 at 9:13 p.m. | Permalink

Older Pulsations

Why can't he at least get some pasties? "Ratlike nipples" came close to making me transefer the Diet Pepsi from my mouth to my nasal cavity. I will have to use that one in real-time conversation.

Posted by Brianne | 10:42 p.m.

HA HA HA HA....I never realized it before, I just thought he was always overheated. I'd never heard of him till I watched the show.

Yeah, he does seem to be fascinated with his own nipples though.

Posted by Anonymous | 12:57 a.m.