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Favorties Friday 2


Ooooh, that fucker on the Honda is gonna get it......I swear, a little fishing line, a paintball gun (thanks for the idea Barry!) and me on the porch....I will get him. OR I will follow him, get his address, and start sending free samples of Rogaine, Viagra and Anusol....

(one would think the guys in marketing could have come up with something a wee bit better than that....but as usual, I digress)

In honor of the fucking bloodfart on the shit Honda, I want some ideas.....

What's your favorite method of revenge? Potatoes rubbed on the car? Sending the fat guy from accounting to hit on that stupid cunt in your department? Farting and walking away? Calls to Crimestoppers?

I once called my Nemisis' pager and punched in the number of a "gay hotline". He's homophobic and as he's addicted to the phone I knew he would call it back. Fucker...! However, he never mentioned it....LMAO!

I prefer a subtler revenge - speaking to them but;

1. Always looking very slightly above their heads - very disconcerting
2. Call them by a different name each time you address them - makes them feel insignificant.

I do number 2 (a no.2!) to anyone I feel is too popular.

Hope that works.

Or stab them in the throat - if you'd rather the direct approach.

I just heard the PERFECT one from a friend....

get an electric breast pump, stick it on BOTH he boobies on MAX, and let it rip. Any women who've been thru it-you KNOW that would hurt...

although stabbing in the throat...that has possibilities...

gay hotline....I have a FEW for that one around the workplace.... :P

LMAO...I like stabbing him in the throat. That one always works for me. I try using a butter knife for the job.

Poking holes in things always works wonders. Not to incriminate myself - but I once heard of this girl who poked a needle into the bottom of her co-workers styrofoam cup. It was quite a mess.

I am a flight attendant and therefore should certainly not be giving away industry secrets, but just one shouldn't hurt. Have you ever heard of cropdusting? It's when a flight attendant walks through the aisles farting as she goes. No one ever would dream that that noxious smell is coming from her pert little ass. Just goes to show you once again that you maybe shouldn't fuck with the people who feed and water you in an enormous tin can at 40 thousand feet.

I always liked the idea of the "send-a-punch." In this dream business you could hire the firm to travel to the cockmonkey in question and lay them out with a big fat solid punch in the mouth.

All they would say after was "Next Time, Be Nice"

I imagine Vinnie Jones would be perfect for this line of work.

If you're gonna stab someone, always use a shared of ice, that way it melts and no one can find the murder weapon. Perfik.

I've always wanted to slice open a scrotum so I can make the guy eat his own nuts......

I COULD cut him with the ice I suppose..

and Erica, cropdusting is a FAVORITE in a call center....on an airplane PURE EVIL.

and I LIKED Kelly Kell's idea....hmmm...almost as good as taping mice and phone receivers...but more mess

send a punch....that's too much...how about send puke! Pay someone to puke on people....

Umm... I haven't had to get revenge on anyone, really, in a long time. If there's someone I REALLY have a problem with I eventually withdraw from him/her completely. I had enough of the constructive confrontation bullshit when I was a kid and adults could force that crap on me.

[off to stew in my inner anger...]

;)

I just pulled this one on a co-worker. I signed him up on rosie o'donnell's emailing list! He's gonna be pissed. But he might even get a free t-shirt! Bahahahahaha!!!!!
Go here to do it! It's easy.
http://www.rosie.com/

now THAT is just evil Brad....

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