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Reasons to dislike being Canadian

Now before anyone gets excited, I'm quietly, mutteringly proud to be canadian just like the rest of us. But all too often, we pretend we're this perfect place...of course, next to our neighbours we do often look like angels but....

Things about being canadian I dislike.
  • I will never be able to name a child "Finnigan" like I wanted to.
  • All our policians share a startling resemblance to mutated penguins, squawking and all.
  • Any good Canadian food is fried, and quite possibly a massive coronary waiting to happen.
  • Everyone leaves Toronto to live in Vancouver. There, they run into all the people from Toronto they didn't like.
  • We have the following seasons...Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter, Construction.
  • You have to like hockey. Or people...look at you funny..
  • You automatically know what I'm talking about when I say "Burnt Toast!".
  • We have a dead boring anthem.
  • EVERYONE from the states always asks if you know a Bob in a city at least 2000 kms away. But yeha, I TOTALLY know Bob in Regina...
  • Moose are REALLY bug and REALLY scary. And they pop up in the woods at the darndest times...same with bears..
  • One starts to think Tim Hortons coffee is good due to rapid exposure.
  • It's cheaper to fly to Prague most of the time, then it is to fly from Toronto to Vancouver.

Things I like about being Canadian (because I'm in a good mood)

  • ALL those fried bad things, poutine, beaver tails...
  • People in Europe like us. They like us so much that americans pretend to be us.
  • If I get sick, I won't die of a heart attack when the bill comes.
  • Generally speaking, we're nice to eachother.
  • Beavers. Beavers are cool-I actually saw one today in the stream near my house.
  • Jean Cretin (whatever) for basically telling Dubya to go fuck himself when he wanted us to drop everything and bomb Iraq. And not caving when Dubya did the political equivilent of "chickens".
  • We like pot. Sure, it's not totally legal, but like anyone cares.

Oh, I'm sure there are tons more, but I'm all out.I'm up WAY later than I'm used to, and it promises to be a long night. Any canadians reading this, feel free to add anything I missed. THe comments should be working now...go to the other blog and tell me if they aren't.

The Europeans LOVE you guys, especially the Brits (the smart brits that is).

Sorry that most of us when meeting you will assume you guys are yanks - it's the accent - it's very similar in our british ears - except you guys say 'aboot' and 'eh?'

Your good things about canada SO out weigh the negative.

I'll get a link set up to you soon.

Oh oh, and my two favourite bands are Canadian types - The Arcade Fire and The Dears - soooo brilliant

gush.

I'm currently grooving on The Arcade Fire", whilst trying not to since they're so hyped lately...but they do rock....

and I REALLY don't get the "aboot" thing, but I will admit I've said "eh" before

Things I like about Canada:

Even the big cities are sort-of safe.

Kraft Dinner is plentiful.

As a student I lived off Tim Horton's food and remained semi-healthy.

There's some cultural diversity and low amounts of racially-motivated violence.

We're nice to fags.

Maple syrup.

Maple fudge and maple candy...make teeth hurt, but yum...

I just noticed a little while back that my new neighbour taps the three maples in his yard...not sure if it's worth it but...maybe I should go make friends...

Stoned Wheat Thins. Try finding those babies anywhere else.

ketchup chips and coffee crisp-apparently, not sold in the US, or at the very least, not in Texas or Tennessee...

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