Spin Me I Pulsate.

You know you've been alone with your kids too long when work seems alluring. Despite my "I'm not working while I'm off" ordinance, I'm actually craving going back to work. And not just because I want to walk to work and play with the new toy the Dorf got me for my birthday.

He came back yesterday, smelling slightly beerish, but otherwise ok. (Some jackass CHECKED BEER which then exploded on it's way to Toronto, going all over the suitcase-who travels with beer?)

After we got reaccquainted, we ordered in from Pizza hut (just a small personal for me thanks-I was good and had Lentil Soup for dinner). He ordered the wings.

7 hours later he wakes me up to hold him because he's freezing and shivering because something was wrong with the wings. Once again, the boy had a mild case of food poisoning. So he's home from work, and resting upstairs, destroying my sleep in chances, since he was up puking half the night.

On a good note, he came home with my new favorite album, by The Essex Green, and older one by the Decemberists (waiting for the new one to arrive-it's out today I believe) and this damn cool Wonder Woman book I was almost going to buy with the GC someone gave me for my birthday.

I love presents, and he's finally beginning to realize this.

So, all is almost normal again here, thankfully. He seems refreshed by having a break, which was why I bothered him to go in the first place. You can't spend all your time around your kids now can you.

Labels: presents, The Dorf, vomit

Posted by thordora at 12:25 p.m. | Permalink | Pulses Taken:

Oh gods I'm beat.

If any military parents who are regularily stuck with their kids for months on end alone are reading this, I feel for you, and you have my utmost respect.

I have NO FREAKING IDEA how you do this every day for months. It's been 3 days of total alone for me, and already I want to run screaming towards a bookstore and hide in the biography section. I'm exhausted.

Of course, priming a room, mowing the lawn of doom, carrying/fighting with children because the goddammed stroller broke half way home, and generally being aware that no one hurts themselves has done a number on me.

Today I find myself coming back to the computer frequently, hoping that something will wake me up. Especially since I've spilled 3 glasses of diet pepsi in the last few days.

I couldn't be a housewive, I just couldn't. I need people, I need quiet time, I need to be able to pee in silence. Last night I was so beat, I had a bag of Doritos for dinner.

You read that right. Doritos. With applesauce for dessert.

I miss my husband, but mostly, I think I miss just having someone else around to talk to, to hug. Banana kisses from a toddler aren't that impressive, all told.

He's back tomorrow.

Labels: The Dorf, tired, toddlers

Posted by thordora at 11:00 a.m. | Permalink | Pulses Taken:

So, I'm sitting here, procrastinating part of my morning away at work. I still have to go grab a coffee, so I spend the time reading my feeds, going thru my links, eating an All-Bran bar which actually tastes good. (I shit you not. I'm officially addicted to the things, and my bowels seem rather happy about that.)

I look at the calender, where I see 4 happy little "OFF" words on my work days this week. The Dorf's bestest friend is/has gotten married, and he's off to the reception this week. (they're getting married in Scotland the bastards, and it's only them and their witnesses since the rest of us are broke. Wait, they have twins, so I don't know how they did it.....)

He even went a got a suit. Fucker. He's never worn a suit for me, but his friend tells him it's a FORMAL affair, and off he goes.

Anyway, I look at the dates and realize I will basically be ALONE with my children for a week and a half. Not a few days. A WEEK AND ONE HALF.

What in the FUCK will I do with them for that long? We don't have a car (on purpose-we're cheap hippies that way) and the transit system here is so bad it's not even funny. Going to the mall is about as amusing as poking myself in the eye with my crochet hooks. We've been to every park within a 30 minute walking radius.

I'm good for my three days a week of my children. I love that I have that. But I am so NOT a housewife it isn't funny. Too long around my kids and I go batty. Simply put, I NEED adults around me, or at least people pretending to be adults. I don't know how I will hack this.

And when I think about it, I know that if I dumped the kids on HIM for this long, he's go batshit. He really would. So I'm getting a little pouty about the entire thing....

On another note, Vivian ratted me out to her Dad this morning as they talked about my birthday present. Vivian starts talking about "Martian Manhunter" and then says

"That's what we got you Daddy!"

followed by

'I'm not supposed to tell you Daddy."

Thanks kid...thanks. So now I have to figure out some OTHER surprise to get for when he comes back (his birthday is at the END of this week). Everything he likes is generally only found on the internet, and I have no Credit Cards. So I dunno. Maybe I'll buy him some porn.

Guys, is porn an acceptable birthday present? If so, what kind?

Oh, it's gonna be a great week isn't it...

Labels: my birthday, porn, The Dorf, trip, vivian

Posted by thordora at 10:10 a.m. | Permalink | Pulses Taken:

My birthday is on Monday, and The Dorf keeps tormenting me by reminding me that my present is "a good one, and I better not ever call him cheap after this one"

While I'm hoping that means I'm getting this, I sorta doubt it.

So I'm on messenger with him earlier, and he's talking about going to get his comics tonight, and make a pithy comment about him hitting the sex store for a present for me. I get the "it's not your birthday" speech.

Whaaa? So?

I tell him I always deserve presents, and he laughs before returning to burning CD's. Now yes, he already got me my Made Out Of Babies shirt (LOVE IT!), and I got him his Voivod one, but frankly, I want more presents.

And I've always felt badly about that. I'm supposed to be a modern girl who renounces material things. Of course, that goes out the window with this dress, which incidentally, would go great with my cute shoes. I have trouble being the girl who wants nothing. She doesn't get along with the girl who wants to be spoiled.

Should I expect more gifts? I can never figure out if it's shallow to want some actual tokens of affection. I know, I should appreciate that I have a guy who loves me, loves his kids, stays home with them, blah blah blah. But once in awhile, I'd like a surprise, flowers at work, chocolate that he doesn't eat if I don't eat it right that minute, something, anything.

It's terrible, I know. I try and resist, but I still always hope that just once, I'll walk up to our bedroom and find a SURPRISE.

I try to surprise him when I can, which is difficult without a creditcard since he doesn't like anything I can get him around here. And I don't believe it's only a man's job to do this crap. He just rarely if ever does it. And having to do it for a birthday/anniversary/Xmas, etc takes all the fun out of it.

Peeps, tell me if I'm being shallow. But also remember that I'm a girl who writes him love poems before ye judge.

Also remember that I like presents, and did I mention it's my birthday on Monday?

Labels: gifts, my birthday, The Dorf

Posted by thordora at 5:12 p.m. | Permalink | Pulses Taken: